Things I Will Never Do Before I Die.

My boyfriend Jeremy and I laid on a mattress in the living room floor. My body ached, my head felt swollen, and I had to face the fact that I would spend the rest of my weekend laying around trying to get well. I began having a stange euphoric feeling from the codeine-enhanced cough syrup, when I realized we had not completed our task of the day, "Things You Will Never Do Before You Die." It was time to come to terms with what I wouldn't accomplish before I died. I began reading aloud the list of items that we may never do before we died and contemplated each item. " Climb Everest... umm like to but no probably wont, .... learn Italian." I look over at Jeremy as he marked no without even a second thought. "You don't think that you will ever learn Italian?" he looks up at me and shrugs his shoulders, "No, probably not I don't have any reason why I would need to learn anything but English." " But what if we move to the Italian country-side.""Well I can speak English there too can't I?" by this point I'm completely turned off by his attitude, but i must get him to agree with me, its a strange complex, " I refuse to live somewhere and not learn their language, that's just like you not wanting to learn Spanish because you think we should speak only English in this country." He looks up at me again, with his pretty blue eyes and long lashes, that he strangely has the skill to bat, "ok babe, your right." and then he adjusts his answer. Yes, I won. Ok next item... " Have a sex change. ( Just for a day).." we both look at each other, I secretly want him to say "yes" so I can make fun of him later, but we both agree that going through that isn't for us and may be a little awkward. I continue down the list, "Collect stamps... that is something I'm sure I'll never do, I don't understand why you would want to do that." Jeremy nods his head in agreement, " Yea, I use to when I was little but I would never collect stamps." Jeremy crosses it off his list. " Wait, wait a minute, if you use to collect stamps when you were little then you already did it and you can't cross it off your list." I said. " Well, I didn't really collect stamps, some kid gave me like three stamps so I said I collected them," Jeremy argued in defense. I wasn't buying it. " You clearly said 'I used to collect stamps' so you used to collect stamps, I'm making a note that you lied and that you used to collect stamps.I'm not letting you get away with this." I made a note in the margin and another note in my head, won again! The codeine continued to influence me as we went further through the list, Jeremy began reading the list since I was beginning to lose consciousness. "Invent a cookie, Yeah I think I can do that, I make cookies all the time." as he said that i reminisced about the last batch of cookies he had made. It was shortly after Christmas and in his stocking his mother had given him a huge, thick, milk chocolate Santa. This Santa was so tough that once one our friend Cole decided to show off and break the Santa in half with one quick punch. Cole broke the Santa, but also ended up damaging his knuckles. So anyways, master chef Jeremy had bought a role of sugar cookie dough and decided to add a little pizazz to the cookies. He shaved the chocolate Santa and sprinkled the shavings atop the cookies before baking. So when Jeremy said he invented a cookie, I imagined the recipe like this: Ingredients one roll sugar cookie dough, one tough ass milk chocolate Santa. I'm not sure if it was the elixir I had taken earlier, or if I just think I am some comic genius, but i laughed so hard at the the thought of this. Every time I tried to compose myself and tell him I would burst into laughter. I laughed so hard it hurt, I could actually feel my stomach compressing, and the slight work out I was getting from laughing so damn hard. Jeremy smiled at me at looked at me with amusement. I kept telling him little parts of the joke at a time before breaking out in laughter once more. After many deep breaths and sighs, I was able to tell him, " and the recipe would specifically call for one chocolate Santa?" he asked before looking at me and undergoing the same torturous laugh. We then laughed together and I realized how great it was to share this moment with him before I die, whenever that may be.